Tuesday, June 9, 2009

RE and Urology Update

I don't know where to start. I know this blog hasn't been updated much about infertility. H did have his urology appt with the urologist, by himself because he canceled on us at the last minute and then rescheduled for a time when I could not be there. Since H seems to get things confused (he was talking about a vegan diet? WTF?), I called the urologist to get the straight scoop. After two messages, and a crabby nurse, I got results that made absolutely no sense to me, and still no phone call back.

My RE called me back since she received the results from the urologist. He has moderate varicocele on the left side, and his numbers are borderline. Borderline bad. Basically, with no improvement, our chances of conceiving are greatly reduced naturally or with IUI, and if we move to IVF, our chances would be the normal IVF percentages. No news there. Apparently, what both doctors are recommending is to attack his MFI with different approaches:

1. Get the varicocele surgically corrected. This has a 50% chance of improving the numbers and it will take 3-6 months, maybe a year before we see results, if ever.
2. Get H back on the vitamins - this could help
3. Get H to change his lifestyle - I mentioned him eating more veggies, but she said that wasn't really the change that needed to be made. I am heartbroken, because there is no way H will ever eat vegan, even if for only a few months. I can't even get him to go meatless one or two nights a week.
4. I'm sure the booze needs to be cut as well, and we all know how that is going. FFS, I quit drinking with him, and that didn't make a difference.

The most frustrating part is that there is a chance that none of these things will work. There is a chance that the varicocele surgery will fix everything! There is probably an even better chance that he will need to really get on board if we want to avoid the cost and strain of IVF.

I am so angry at him right now. All I asked was for him to take some stupid vitamins and cut his drinking back to 3 a week - just for three months to see if it would help! And he wouldn't do it. I feel defeated. I have a mental block - I can't remember to temp in the morning, nor can I remember to take my prenatal. What difference does it make? I love this man, but I am questioning our marriage. It's obvious that our commitment levels are tremendously different.

On the other side, I did get a chance to talk with my RE about my bicornate uterus. It's very, very slight and she doesn't feel the need to do a lap unless we had suffered a pregnancy loss or complication. Considering I have never, ever gotten a bfp, I guess that means no lap for now. She hinted that we could try some low tech fertility treatments while we are waiting to see if the varicocele surgery worked (read between the line = clomid?), but that just seems like a complete waste of time, money and hot flashes.

11 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. I know what it's like to have a husband that isn't quite on the same page. I hope once he finds a job, your husband will come around. {{HUGS}}

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  2. I ran across your blog, we also have MFI and vericiles(worse than yours acutally) did the urologist mention trying clomid or hcg injects for your husband to increase his counts, etc.??

    We at one point had 300, yes HUNDRED total sperm with 3% motility and after 4 months of hcg injects (clomid did not work for him) my DH went up to 40 million!! We ended up getting pg on our 3rd IUI after that.

    Just wanted to let you know that there are options and wish you luck!!!

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  3. I am so, so sorry you are going through this.

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  4. I am so sorry. I know exactly how frustrating it can be. Hugs to you, and let's hit El Callejon soon. That makes everything better. <3

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  5. I'm so sorry you're going through this...:(

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  6. (((HUGS))) I am so sorry you are going through all of this.

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  7. I'm sorry to hear you are going through this. ((hugs))

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  8. I'm sorry my friend, I really am. SP? Anytime.

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  9. I'm so sorry A :( I'm saying lots of prayers that your hubby gets it together. It's so hard when they won't even stick with the smallest changes.

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  10. I'm so sorry you're going through this and that your husband isn't doing his part. I hope he gets on board soon. *Hugs*

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